i'm so tired of feeling like this

[illusion_is_mine]

     Well I had my therapy session today, and after I discussed how I've been feeling lately she came to the conclusion that I have depression.  I basically told her about a few fleeting thoughts I'd been having over a period of time.  I've also been having issues with one of my friend's, and she told me she could tell something was wrong as soon as I walked in.  She wants to send me a to a lab to do some tests so that she knows for sure that it's depression.  She also talked about putting me on medication.  She said she just wanted to put me on a small dosage to just try it and see if it works.  I'm honestly not too keen on being on medication, but if it helps then I'm open to it.  

     I'm tired of feeling miserable all the time.  If this is a step in the right direction then I'm willing to try it.  My therapist was surprised that no one address my depression earlier.  I told her that I was diagnosed with moderate depression after my sister died, but the doctor never treated my depression at all.  At this point I'm just trying to distract myself from feeling shitty.  I tried playing guitar yesterday, but I wasn't able to get the results I wanted so I just stopped.  I think I'm just going through a rough patch, and I hope it works out.  That's all I have is hope anyway.