illusion_is_mine

 This week was okay I guess.  My dad did end up coming home last Wednesday, and he's going to be having his surgery in a month or so.  It's not as soon as he wanted, but the surgeon is on vacation so that's why they couldn't do it sooner.  He's been doing good, and has been off work so he's had a chance to rest, and recover.  

As for me I've been good.  I had a coworker that annoyed the hell out of me the other day.  The creepy guy that won't leave me alone he an insufferable personality, and apparently he can't enjoy things that take him outside his comfort zone.  He's also super competitive, and immature.  I've actually considered avoiding him altogether because I feel like it's a waste of time talking to someone like him.  Even though we both like video games that's honestly the only thing we have in common, and we have completely different taste in everything else.  Plus he creeps me out, and he legit wears the same clothes everyday.  I usually don't care about stuff like that, but it's like dude you have a job you can afford to care about how you look.  I'm starting to wish I would have never talked to him in the first place.  I even gave him a sort of *hint*, and told him I seem to attract "strange people", and he goes "I'm not that strange", and my response was "If you say so...".  

An old coworker texted me this morning, and mentioned we should have lunch one day.  I was really glad to hear from her because we ended up getting along really well when she worked here, and I'd been wondering what she was up to.  She told me I'd been on her mind which was nice to hear. :)

As for other things I've been reading a new manga I just started called "Black Clover", and I'm really digging it.  I love all the characters, and it's about magic so of course I'm all in.  

As for music I've been listening to all sorts of different stuff.  I honestly couldn't pin point it to one specific genre or specific artists since my tastes has been all over the place lately.  I've been listening to The Fin's newest album, and I've been digging it.  Here's a song from one of their previous albums that I really like called "Till Dawn". 

In other news I'm really excited about the new Tomb Raider game coming out this year "Shadow of the Tomb Raider."  I wasn't too excited at first, but after seeing this video it made my hype level go up quite a bit.  I know a lot of people don't care for the TR reboots, but I honestly love them.  I do not miss the old Tomb Raider games at all, and I grew up on them.  The new games are a breath of fresh air tbh.  

A lot of things have been going on lately.  My mom is having surgery to have her gallbladder removed this Thursday so I'm very anxious about that.  She'll need 2 weeks to recover so I'm going to be doing the grocery shopping for the month.  I'm not really looking forward to that since I hate grocery shopping, but we gotta eat so yeah.  My grandma also had a minor surgery yesterday that I just found out about.  She's doing okay, and recovering at home. 

My mom's birthday was this past Saturday, and my sister had a cookout for her on Sunday.  It was pretty fun, and it was great seeing the family all together again. :)

I was supposed to go to the dermatologist today, but I called and cancelled due to a really bad thunderstorm coming through this morning.  The weatherman mentioned flooding, and a bunch of traffic issues so I decided to reschedule my appointment.  

Besides all the personal stuff going on I'm almost at the end of Super Mario Odyssey, and I gotta say I've been enjoying it quite a bit.  I really does remind me a lot of Super Mario 64, and how huge of a leap forward that was for the franchise.  I've also started playing Persona 5 again.  It drags in places, but the story is very interesting.  I finally feel like I'm getting to the point where the story is picking up.  I've also been playing Fallout 3, and Nier Automata.  My coworker says I jump from game to game way too much, but really I just play what I'm in the mood for at that moment.  I don't think there's a particular way to play video games.  Especially since playing games for me is a way to unwind, and shut out the world.  For certain games I usually have to take a break from them for a while or I'll get burned out on the (ei: Fallout 4.) I also purchased Farcry 3 from the xbox marketplace for my 360 since it was on sale.  I was initially looking at getting Farcry 5, but here lately I've been avoiding buying games at launch at least until they patch all the bugs, and everything.

As for music I've been listening to lots of Chelsea Wolfe, Fleetwood Mac, Lacuna Coil, and Turnstile.  A weird combination I know, but my music taste is very much reflected in my mood, and how I'm feeling at the moment.  

Well that's all for now.  Here's a trailer for Farcry 5 since the plot of this game is sort of interesting.

I'm really not a fan of holidays to be honest.  Mainly because there's so much preparation involved, and overall stress that is going to the store, and getting food, and cooking.  I also think it's a combination of having to look after my mom, and doing all the cleaning, and cooking.  My dad helps, but he's pretty clueless when it comes to a lot of housework stuff.  For instance I had to show him how to wash his clothes.  It wasn't a problem, but I guess I figured he already knew.  It turns out he'd never washed clothes before so I tried to explain everything as much as I could.

Today at the store some lady kept standing right on the back of me when I was in the check out line.  I gave her sort of a "wtf are you doing?"  look, but for some reason she never moved.  So I moved as much as I could.  To be honest the lady was pissing me off.  I don't get why people are so horrible, and shitty around holidays.  Human decency doesn't go out the window just because you decided to buy stuff at the last minute.  I swear people get on my nerves.

That being said I have a few family members over right now, and they're cooking stuff for tomorrow.  I'm making the ham so it's boiling on the stove at the moment.  I'll be glad when Thanksgiving is over so things can get back to normal.  The older I get the less I enjoy holidays.  

    Our relatives from Colorado are visiting this weekend, and they're gone out with my mom to a bunch of places I guess.  I don't know but I'm still very salty about how they treated us when we went to Panama this summer.  I know I shouldn't hold grudges, but They basically left us hanging in a foreign country, and had a guy basically screw us out of a lot of money for transportation, among other shady things. 

 My grandpa's funeral turned out to be really nice.  He was a veteran that fought in Vietnam so he had a military burial, and they gave my aunt a US flag, and did the whole folding of the flag.  I will point out that religious funerals are always strange to me since I'm not religious at all.  I'm agnostic so I don't have a problem with it completely, but it's still strange to me.  I mean the eulogy the pastor gave didn't really count as a eulogy to me.  It was just telling people that they need to "get right" before their time comes.  I sort of have cognitive dissonance when it comes things like that.  Most people here are religious, and I can't say anything about it without it turning to an argument so I just keep it to myself.  

After the burial I decided to go home, and chill.  I'd had my fill of dealing with people all yesterday, and needed some alone time to sort out my thoughts.  I also played a bit of Nier Automata, and Fallout 4.  I'm not sure why I still play FO4 at this point because I think the story is pretty lame, but I guess I just want to finish the game, and loot things...lol.  I also started playing Shin Megami Tensei: Digital Devil Saga, and I've been enjoying it so far.  I feel like I'm finally getting the hang of the battle system in SMT games which makes me happy.  

As for Nier I kept getting my ass handed to me by this boss in particular.  I'm playing it in Normal mode, and this boss is still quite difficult.  I've almost got it though.  I think I'll try my hand it again today.  I plan on spending much needed quality time with this game for a while.  

This week has sort of been up and down.  My parents found out Sunday night that my grandfather isn't expected to live that long.  His kidney's are failing him, and he has a whole other slew of problems.  He's come out of really bad illnesses before so I'm hoping he recovers, and I'm trying to stay positive.  In the back of my mind though I've also been preparing for the worst.  

My friend called me that night I found out after I told her over text.  She told me the reason she hasn't been able to stay in contact is because she's had some deaths in the family, and her dog died.  She thought that I hated her, but I reassured her that I didn't hate her.  I figured that she had something serious going on in her family.  I'm glad we were able to reconnect, because I didn't know if she would contact me again.

All that aside I've been doing okay.  I've been mostly trying to take my mind off of everything by gaming, and reading.  I bought Sonic Mania recently, and I've been enjoying playing that.  It also made me want to play Sonic Colors so I plugged up the Wii, and played that along with Metroid Prime 3: Corruption, and Fallout 4 yesterday.  

Did anyone see the eclipse yesterday here in the US?  I manged to put together one of those shoebox pinhole viewers and got to see it.  It was pretty cool.  I'd never done something like that before so it was really enjoyable.  

Oh yeah, my car insurance company sent me a check yesterday.  I guess they won the case where they sued the company of the lady that hit me in that bad accident.  I wasn't expecting anything so I'm glad it all worked out in the end. :)

I hope everyone has a great week.

     I hope everyone enjoyed their mother's day weekend.  Mine was okay, but I had a bit of stress at work.  Remember that person at work that wouldn't leave me alone?  Yeah, she's still at it.  Yesterday when I was working the lights in our area went out.  It scared the crap out of me because my anxiety was really bad yesterday.  Needless to say when I looked up from my cubical I saw that creepy girl, along with another girl standing next to the light switch.  So she's harassing me when I work now?  At this point I'm going to go to my sister and tell her to set her straight and leave me the fuck alone.  I don't care why she's doing it at this point I just want her to stop.  I don't understand people like this at all.  I go to work, and don't bother anyone.  I know that she'll probably deny everything, but it's better to have my sister confront her since she's in management, and they're on friendly terms.  I actually told my sister about this previously, but she didn't take me seriously because "She's really nice."  Well she's nice to you, but she's an asshole to me.  Hopefully this will make her finally leave me the fuck alone.

    On a more positive note I bought my mom and Barnes and Nobels gift card for $25 since she likes reading on her tablet, and a really cute mother's day card.  They all went to my grandmother's house on mother's day, but I decided to go home since I was on edge yesterday.  I was so exhausted mentally from what happened at work I didn't have the energy to deal with anymore people.  

    Also I've been progressing in Persona 5 I'm glad to say.  I finally feel like I'm getting used to the gameplay now.  I've made a few confidants, and I feel like I'm finally forming bonds with them.  I've also been trying to finish Breath of the Wild, but I have one more minor boss to defeat before I head to Hyrule castle.  He ended up being tougher than I thought so I'm going to try to figure out a strategy and beat him today.  I also bought an Assassin's Creed game since the games were on sale on the Playstation store this previous weekend.  I bought Assassin's Creed Syndicate, and I'm really enjoying it so far.  Here's the trailer for the game.   I love steampunk stuff so this game is something I could really get into.

As for music I've been listening to Code Orange's "Forever", Siouxsie and the Banshee's "Superstition", The Creature's "Bestiary of", Balance and Composure "Separation", Title Fight "Hyperview", BTS "You Never Walk Alone", Chevelle "Wonder What's Next", Delain "The Human Contradiction", The Twilight Sad "No One Can Ever Know", and Depeche Mode "Songs of Faith and Devotion".  I need to do a post with my favorite albums I own on Vinyl now that I'm thinking about it.  It'll probably come in the near future.  

My birthday is in a few weeks!  I took that week off work, and I'm glad I did.  I will need that vacation from the stress of work considering what's been going on lately. 

 So this will be a short update of what's been going on with me lately.

• My aunt left for Afghanistan last Friday.  Right now she's on the military base in El Paso so she hasn't left the country yet. She sent a group text to my sister, my mom, and a few other family members this morning saying that she wanted to come home, and that she didn't qualify for training.  She said things are really hectic on the military base with everything that's been happening, and that she doesn't want to go.  My sister and my cousin are talking about driving to El Paso to pick her up.  I do hope she can come home.  I was really worried when she mentioned where she would be going.  She sounds like she's trying to come back home so I'm glad that she probably won't be going to Afghanistan.  
• I took advantage of the flash sale at the Playstation Store had over the weekend.  I ended up buying The Last of Us (Remastered), Dishonored (Definitive edition), and Wild Arms 3.  I also bought Blaster Master 0 for my Nintendo Switch.  I really love The Last of Us, Wild Arms 3, and Blaster Master 0 so far.  I'm also still playing Breath of the Wild, but I'm taking my time and just exploring stuff.
• I watched One Punch Man, and Ranma 1/2 a bit yesterday.  I've been behind on anime so I enjoyed that quite a bit.  Ranma always cracked me up with how much trouble he would get himself into, or make Akane super pissed at him.  
• As for music I've been listening to lots of Chelsea Wolfe lately.  If you haven't heard of her she's probably one of my favorite newer artists out right now.  I love how dark her music is, and the ambiance of it.  I think the guitar pedals add a nice effect to her overall sound.  Here's a video of her performing one of her songs off her newer album "Abyss" called "Survive".  ( You said you won't fall apart... )

 I know it's been a while since I've  posted, but I'll update today with bullet points cause it's easier!  

• My mom's birthday is friday, and my niece is planing a surprise party at a resturant called Bone Daddy's.  Now I asked my coworker about the place, and it turns out it similar to hooters?  I'm not sure why she picked that place...lmao.  Either way I get to see hot women walking around serving food so I'm definitely not opposed to it xD!   
• My parents and I finally sent off for our passports, and we should be getting them in about a month.  I'm getting really excited about the Panama trip you guys!  It's coming up rather quickly.
• I've been playing Xenoblade Chronicles, which is fun as hell.  I love the fighting system in that game.  I've also been playing Fallout 4, and I'm really enjoying that one a lot.  I found this excellent video by The Game Theorist where he does an interesting analysis of what happened to the people after the nuclear fallout.  
• Spring is finally here!  I've had to take out my shorts, and capri pants because as you know the heat in Texas can be brutal.  It's mostly been comfortable t-shirts, and capris for me these days.
• That strange girl that was sort of following me around at work hit on my sister when they went to a club.  I had to laugh when my mom told me because it was just predictable.  I mean I figured she wouldn't hit on her boss, but apparently she has no common sense at all whatsoever. 
• I decided to get my mom a nice birthday card, and some money for her birthday.  She's been complaining about being broke so I figured money would be a great gift..lol.
• My allergies have been kicking my ass, and I think the fact that spring is right around the corner isn't helping at all. :( 
• That's all for now. :D

 Aside from what's been happening in the previous post I'd say everything has been going well.  I went to the doctor last week for a follow up, and she put me on a water pill because she didn't think my blood pressure was low enough.  I'm not used to taking so much medication, but if it helps then I'm all for it.

As for the annoying girl at work I haven't seen her for the past few days so that was a relief.  

I'm glad I got most of my Christmas shopping out of the way.  I made plans with my friend to exchange gifts on the 19th so that should be fun.  I'm also off work 3 days after Christmas so I'm glad for the break.  I've been feeling somewhat anxious this past week so it will be good to have a break from the stress of day to day life, and just enjoy the holidays.  

I've also got a quite a few anime to catch up on that I bought from Rightstuf during their holiday sale.  I've been catching up on Dragon Ball Z.  I'm at the end of Season 3 right now, and it's gotten really crazy.  

As for music I've been addicted to the new White Lies album "Friends" lately.  I've initially got into them thanks to evils recommending a song of theirs from their first album.  This new album is a huge improvement from their last album "Big TV."  I love Harry Mcveigh's vocals so much, and their overall style.  Here are the videos for "Morning in LA", and "Take it out on me."  The latter being a bit weird lol, but I like it.  Also I just realized that the video for "Morning in LA" is a nod to Killing Joke's "Love Like Blood" music video.  I'm a huge fan of Killing Joke so I noticed it right away.  I wonder if anyone else noticed the reference.  ( Take it out on me...i'm in love with the feeling )